Alzheimer's Or Parkenson

This afternoon's visit to see Paul at Good Shepherd was a surprise and very difficult one. For the passed few weeks, Paul has not recognised me at all. And according to the nurses and workers, He has not been communicating or recognising them. But they all said he seemed to be comfortable.

Most days they wheel him into the TVroom. There are some really nice recliners. It takes two people to get him strapped up an turned around and down onto the chair. Once there he is very comfortable. His feet are up and he can really relax.

The nurses told me that a few days ago, he was sitting in the TV room with several of the residents, they were watching a old western. When all of a sudden he yells out "Stop all that shooting those guns in here before you kill so one!" The nurses are still laughing about it because he went right back to his silents and continued not to communicate any more.

I had a great surprise tonight. When I arrived they had just wheeled him into the dinning room for dinner. When I went up to him I told him 'Hi' as I always do and that I am Raenell. Which I have been getting a quite answer like Hi, or Good To See you. But not expression of knowing me at all.

When I tried to talk to he about watching the TV or what did he have to eat. He didn't seem to know at all. And that he didn't want to be bothered. This had gone on for several weeks.

However tonight he was in his chair up at the dinning room. They asked if I would like to help him with his dinner. I tried and tried, but he wanted very little bits. They had made egg sandwiches that looked really good,(he use to really like them) a small bowel of peaches and lettuce, sliced tomatoes and pickles. With milk to drink. He only nibbled at a half of his sandwich. He enjoyed most all of the peaches and he liked the pickles and tomatoes and a few potato chips. Most all of it was left, he didn't even want the very nice cooky they had backed.

He did however keep asking about our neighbors and how were they doing an how nice they were. And how much he missed me and how sorry he was that he had to leave me so soon. And that we had not had more fun time together. He started crying and telling be how special I was to love him like I have.

All I could do was tell him how much I loved him and hold his hands. And tell him how sorry I was and cryed with him. Holding is hands seemed to help them from shaking hard from the Parkenson.

When time came that I needed to leave, he asked me to rub his back a bit. He really loved that, and began to cry some more and tell me he really loved me,

It has been a very long time since he has talked to me like that. I almost wondered if he was trying to really saying good by. He also said something about seeing me again up in heaven.

It was really hard because it was as if he thought he was really saying Good By!

When I left there I had to go right over to my Weight Watch meeting. That was good for me. I got to talk to a couple of ladies my age that have had experiences with loved ones and were very nice to try to help me.

At least I didn't go straight home to an empty house. But when I did get home I wasn't really alone.

Snoopy and Charlie my little dogs were at my feet excited about getting scratched and petted. Thank goodness for those two little guys they always seem to know when I am down, and they try to cheer me up.